When Nelson Gross was killed by a couple of teenagers in a botched abduction and robbery, the murder shook his family in predictable and terrible ways. For his daughter, Dinah Lenney, the loss sparked a self-reckoning that led to this candid memoir that is by turns funny and sad, frustrating and fulfilling.

Acknowledgments

1. Prologue: Eliza Wants to Know

2. The Contents of the File

3. The Last Visit

4. Missing

5. Just Business

6. Still Missing

7. Driving Lessons

8. Waiting

9. My Old Man

10. The House with the Gate

11. I Remember

12. Albert and Rose

13. Acting

14. Eulogies

15. Christmas with Dogs

16. Looking for Crumbs

17. The Drama of the Not Particularly Gifted Child

18. October, 1998

19. Mementos

20. Messages Received

21. Nelson and Leah

22. Coming and Going

23. Mythology

24. Two Fathers

25. My Father under My Fingernails

26. Resentment

27. Conjecture

28. Uncles

29. Recovery

30. Keeping in Touch

31. Family Gifts

32. After Life

33. A Pretty Good Day

34. Coda

Dinah Lenney's essays and reviews have appeared the New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Ploughshares, Agni, Creative Nonfiction, Brevity, Kenyon Review Online, and elsewhere. She received a Special Mention for her work in the Water-Stone Review and the 2010 Pushcart Prize anthology. Lenney has a BA from Yale University and an MFA from the Bennington Writing Seminars, where she serves as a member of the core faculty. She also teaches in the Rainier Writing Workshop at Pacific Lutheran University in Tacoma, Washington, as well as in the Master of Professional Writing program at the University of Southern California. A working actor in theatre, film, and television, Lenney co-authored Acting for Young Actors and has guest-starred on numerous television shows. You can visit her websites at www.dinahlenney.com  and  http://college.usc.edu/thegamut/author/dinahlenney/